After MTV's Anta Hurr(You're free) episode, sexurity forces are storming Tripoli shutting down cinemas that screen erotic content as reported by Al-Safir.
All hail our new savior, Joe "Zorro" Maalouf for cleaning our cities from pornography and masturbation!
Zorro, and ex-Aljarass news reporter, is a professional rumor mill and cheap story sensationalist. As required by Aljaras high standards, he should be an eminent sexologist with a major in scandalogy. I propose him starting a new career as a sexandalogist teaching our younger generations the art of cheapness, وخذوا ما يدهش العالم.
While watching his journalistic marvel, I couldn't help but cry at the peak of his ramble when he stated he had to remove the sound of "Adhan" from the footage and started a religious puritanical crusade on the deviant society urging the Cheikhs to act at once.
I can't imagine that people masturbate in the first place, but people masturbating while others are praying!! Blasphemy! Brothers and sisters, this should end now! Death to the blasphemers in the name of God's messenger Zorro!
We can now all sleep better because we are more free(like the program's title). Free from people masturbating, free from pornography, free from gay sex!! All of that thanks to Zorro our savior.
Our country is sinking in religious war, bigotry, corruption and a man can proudly slap his wife forcing her to please his carnal desires. But hey! at least we got rid of porn and masturbation!
I announce today to be the national porn day, let's all watch as much porn as possible while masturbating. Where the hell are the tissues when you need them!?